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by Dov Heller Blind love is not the way to choose a spouse. With the divorce rate over 50 percent, too many are apparently making a serious mistake in deciding who to spend the rest of their life with. Here are practical tools for keeping your eyes wide open. To avoid becoming a "statistic," try to internalize these 10 insights. #1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you're married. The classic mistake. Never marry potential. The golden rule … [Read more...]
We tend to get so caught up in the merchandising of Valentine's Day that we forget what the holiday is really about: Love. When Erin Bried was interviewing grandmothers for her book, How to Sew a Button (and Other Nifty Things Your Grandmother Knew), she asked each one for their secret to making love last, decade after decade. Watch this video to hear the advice of these wise women, each happily married for over 50 years! And if you're looking for more every-day wisdom, you should … [Read more...]
Valentine's Day is just a week away! Make this year's celebration of love truly memorable with a new twist on old traditions! The Valentine's Day tradition started in the early 1700s, and for centuries it was celebrated with an exchange of handwritten notes and handmade tokens of affection. (You can thank the Victorians for today's Valentine's Day style—they liked their paper goodies dolled up with lavish images of lovebirds, cupids, and flowers!) When printing technology began to … [Read more...]
Recent studies estimate that 45 percent of married women and approximately 54 percent of married men engage in extramarital sex at some time or another during their marriage, according to Hitched. Shocking, isn't it? Nothing destroys a marriage faster than marital infidelity, and these statistics are truly frightening. But it is possible to "affair-proof" your marriage, says Sharon M. Rivkin, M.A., M.F.T. In order to make that happen, you need to know what can cause an affair in the first … [Read more...]
"Couples who play together stay together," says Gail Saltz, MD at iVillage. She talks about a new study from the University of Denver, showing that couples who have more fun time together also report more marital satisfaction and good feelings about their partner. Now this probably seems obvious to you, but the ironic part is that so many couples are working very hard to be able to afford some fun... and yet they don't make any time to actually do that. Another recent study found that couples … [Read more...]
When I think about the word "romance" I tend to think about things like... a wedding day or a honeymoon... an unexpected love note, a surprise gift, or a special anniversary candle-lit dinner. What do these things have in common? They are all once-in-a-lifetime or even once-in-a-while events, and this is what seems to make them special. But does something need to be a novelty or a surprise to make it special and romantic? Karen Sherman, Ph.D., (www.drkarensherman.com),a practicing … [Read more...]
What is love and what keeps it alive? What is marriage and what makes it work? Maybe it takes a poet to express the first, and a philosopher to explain the second. If you want to unlock the secrets of a good marriage, start with these quotes from some of the world's most famous people. You can find a longer list at about.com... these are some of my favorites to give you something to think about: Mohandas K Gandhi I first learned the concept of non-violence in my marriage. Socrates My … [Read more...]
I wear my wedding ring (engagement ring plus wedding ring) rarely, usually if I'm getting "dressed up." I don't know what the unwritten ring-wearing laws are, but I know there are women who never, ever take their rings off. The reason I stopped wearing my rings is boring: when I had kids, the prongs of my square diamond became annoying; I would often scratch my baby when changing a diaper or pulling on a little shirt. So rather than taking the rings on and off a dozen times I day I just … [Read more...]
That headline caught my eye! Even though I am married, I have a single sister and many single friends! so I read with interest this ivillage article called "5 Love Mistakes that Are Keeping You Single". I thought Sherry Amatenstein's advice was sensible, and if you can't seem to find true love, her commentary might give you the help you need to make a change. "If one or two sound familiar," she says, "Don't beat yourself up. Just recognize that you deserve better and commit to making a … [Read more...]
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